and just like that... he was gone

Man… I don’t really know where to start here, so I’ll just come out and let you all know what’s going on to the best of my ability.

2010 has been one of the most difficult and trying years of my life. Yet at the same time, it’s also been one of the most rewarding in many ways as well. I’ve struggled with many many things, situations, and people, and have put myself in a position where if I don’t make this next move, the relationship I have with my family, namely my children, will cease to exist, and that’s something I can’t let happen. My kids are absolutely the most important thing in my life. Even over music. I can’t be so selfish to abandon them for my own selfish pursuits. I’ve seen people who have, and the results are pretty devastating.

So on New Year’s Eve this year I will play my final show with 90 Minutes. On December 30^th, I’ll play my final show with Grasshopper. I will be taking an indefinite amount of time off from the stage. I may be found here and there doing one-off shows with people either as a fill-in or promoting my own music, but my days of spending the better part of my week in bars are coming to a close for a while.

I’m going to go back to school first and finish my Associates Degree, and may continue further if that is a success. In the meantime I will be booking shows for the bands 90 Minutes, Lost Wax, and may take on a few more as well. I’ll be writing and recording and finishing my first “solo” recording titled “Train Wrecks, Havoc, and Heartbreak” and putting together some new music for the follow-up record tentatively titled “Am Big You Us”.

I’m also going to work very hard at mending some broken relationships that took a serious blow in 2010 that mean a great deal to me.

2009 I saw a year of hopes and dreams coming to fruition and reality. 2010 I saw them all go away just as quickly, and mostly this seems to be due to my own personal battles with addiction, low self-worth and esteem, and my lack of being able to stay focused on the things and people who were truly important. I used performing as a platform and excuse to wreck everything around me all in the name of entertainment so to speak, when really I was just using it to medicate my own self indulgence and it’s finally all come to a head.

I want to tell you all one thing though.

Leaving 90 Minutes has been one of the hardest decisions I’ve ever had to make. I’m so incredibly proud of that band. 90 Minutes was the first project that I started alone with my own concept, my own vision, and my own crew that I essentially handpicked, that has grown to success on its own. Every other band I’ve worked with that has had success was something I came into that was either already successful, or on its way to being successful.

Go-Go Ray and I have played on stage together for nearly 14 years coming up. We met and started playing in 1998 and haven’t looked back. I’ve found my best friend in who I feel is the finest drummer I’ll ever work with. I feel this simply because not only is he an incredible expert at his instrument, but he’s also one of the few people in my life that I feel I fully know and who knows me. I can trust him with anything. My life, my money, my whatever. Without Go-Go Ray, this band wouldn’t be nearly as special as it has become. So I have to thank him greatly for all that he’s put up with over the years, and for all that he’s contributed as well. Go-Go himself has many fans and friends who know that any day now he’s going to be up there playing with the legends of music where he belongs. While 2010 was my year of loss, it has certainly been Go-Go’s year of gain. Go-Go Ray recently won Roland V-Drum’s national best drummer contest in Vegas. I believe 2011 will only bring even greater things should he continue down the path he’s on. I’m so proud to have played with Go-Go for so long… and trust me when I say that I will play with him again very soon. There’s always something cookin’ musically for Go-Go and I. I just can’t say right now what that is.

Josh Johnson came into 90 Minutes a little later than the core of the band, but has proved himself to be without question in my own mind the finest most incredible guitar player in this city. His ability to embrace diversity and mold his guitar playing and tonality to the myriad of styles and genres we cover is simply unmatched by anyone. And believe me, we’ve tried other people to fill in for him, and let’s just say, I wouldn’t ever want to try to fill that guy’s shoes. His education behind a soundboard, his knowledge of gear and tone and what it takes to give well over 100% every single night in my opinion makes him the best overall guitar player I’ve ever been lucky enough to work with in this city. His band The Slowdown is doing very well as of late and has already garnered a great loyal fan base. It’s just a matter of time before someone takes this genuine talent for themselves. is hiIt simply doesn’t get much better than “Josh Johnson on the guitar!”

What can I say about Sara Brazil that hasn’t already been said? Well I can say this. She came into this band as a pretty face with a good voice to help bring balance to a room of swingin’ testosterone and has stayed on and worked hard to be one of 3 original members left after so many have come and gone. She has gained a fan base all of her own both within 90 Minutes and outside of it as well. She was thrown in a fire in a matter of weeks when this all started and through many doubters and naysayers proved herself to be very valuable in any project. She has gone on to be asked to do her own weekly show at O’Dowds on the Plaza and sing backup vocals for bands like Audiovox and more. But perhaps more importantly for me anyway, she’s become one of the most important friendships I’ve ever had. She’s been there for me in ways that no one else has or could be. And I’m proud to know her and to be her friend as well. She starts her weekly show pm Tuesday the 21^st of December at O’Dowds. Go say hello and support her. I think you’ll find it to be a great time.

THE John Pyne before I met him was just this strange lookin’ guitar player in a band called Load Point Pull that I would later come to play in myself for about a year. But when I met him during our tenure at FUEL with the karaoke band “Shut Up And Sing”, I found out the reason why they call him “THE” John Pyne. I’ll never ever meet another man like him, and though I wish like hell he was a full time member of 90 Minutes, I’ve always just been happy to get him when I could. John has the most magnificent mind I’ve ever seen in a human being without reading about it or hearing about it through some form of media. He never stops blowing me away every single time words come out of his face. The things that man can do are something out of a movie or episode of Star Trek or something. I mean… the guy’s an alien, and one of the most resourceful people on the planet. I’m so so glad to be his friend and I appreciate everything he’s brought to my life.

Tyler Lyon will be the new guy until he takes off and hits the road for good – which is something I have no doubt will happen within the next year or two. In the short time I’ve gotten to know Tyler, I’ve been blessed with a talent that’s so unique and unusual (I mean, who plays a right handed guitar WELL backwards and upside down??!?!?!) that I have no doubts that I will continue to work with him again sometime down the line. His strength as a vocalist has made him the club-owner favorite out of all the singers 90 Minutes has had, and his kindness, and easy demeanor has made him a gem to the band as well. And though I feel as though Tyler has great potential to unfortunately move on sooner than later, we all greatly value his time, talent, and personality that he’s sharing with us right now and can’t wait to see what the future will bring him. I have no doubt that he’ll go just as far as he wants to go. His new band Evalyn Awake is a stellar example of what you can do when you focus and apply yourself to your own hopes and dreams with everything you’ve got.

Also, I must extend a thank you to those of you who helped make 90 Minutes happen and get off the landing strip... so to Bill Cameron, Brian Brooks, Freddie Francis, Json "Mole" Molnar, and for the many many players who've filled in over the years when we couldn't all be there, thank you all!

I sincerely HATE to leave this band or the world I’ve known for so very many years. It’s been one of the most painful struggles I’ve ever had to endure. But I do however need to “dry out” and rediscover who I really am. And that road very well may lead me right back to the stages of Kansas City or somewhere else. But for now I’m really going to focus on a few things and hope to come out clean on the other side like Andy in Shawshank Redemption.

So with this I say thank you very very much to all the people who made 90 Minutes and everything else I’ve done musically over the last several years possible.

Thank you to all the amazing bands and musicians who I’ve had the great honor to play on stage with over the last few years, and I’ll be back again soon. Please come out to my final shows and say hello. I will not be out and about much for quite some time.

DECEMBER:

15 – JERRY’S BAIT SHOP LEE’S SUMMIT, MO – 3^RD AND MAIN WITH 90 MINUTES
16 – BREWTOP PUB & PATIO – NORTH KANSAS CITY, MO – BOARDWALK AND I-29 WITH GRASSHOPPER
17 – INTENTIONS – OVERLAND PARK, KS – 80^TH AND METCALF WITH 90 MINUTES
18 – BREWTOP PUB & PATIO – NORTH KANSAS CITY, MO – BOARDWALK AND I-29 WITH 90 MINUTES
22 – BEAUMONT CLUB WITH POMEROY
23 – O’DOWDS PLAZA WITH 90 MINUTES
29 – FINAL JERRY’S LEE’S SUMMIT SHOW
30 – FINAL BREWTOP SHOW WITH GRASSHOPPER
31 – FINAL SHOW WITH 90 MINUTES AT D-LUXE LOUNGE IN PARKVILLE